Life got to me, and my attitude sucked.
I tried to remain upbeat and not let the world around me affect my mood. But, after months of depressing news about the virus and feelings of isolation and frustrations with my living situation, I could no longer fight it.
I got angry at the littlest thing and picked fights with my husband. He was probably glad he was at work most of the day. The summer heat was oppressive, and I didn’t take my prayer walks.
I was only taking brief walks with the dogs.
I cried when I was home alone. Prayer and positive self-talk didn’t work. I was wrapped up in myself, heading down into depression.
Then, I saw my youngest granddaughter’s text.
We sent texts through Kid’s Messenger, but I hadn’t received any texts from her in a while. Her older sister was texting me about once a week, sending me a ‘Guess what this drawing is?’ And I didn’t need to open the app to see her messages.
That day, I decided to open the Kid’s Messenger app. And I saw multiple messages from my 10-year-old granddaughter. Many were sad animations and texts asking if I was there. She wanted me to go to one of her softball games. And she missed me.
I immediately replied, letting her know I had just seen her messages. She was offline.
I called my daughter and chatted with my young granddaughter. And when my daughter was back on the phone, I told her how I felt. We talked about a visit. Before the end of the day, I had reserved a rental car, and three days later, Andy was helping me load my suitcase into the truck. He understood.
I had a wonderful visit. We took long walks and just hung out together. Nothing special or pre-planned. Except for the softball game that opened the door for me to admit I needed help.
I’ve been back in Oklahoma City for about two weeks. The RV Park where we’re staying hasn’t changed. And the heat is still oppressive.
But my attitude has changed, and I’m looking for the good in this situation. I have resumed my morning walks. This time, I pray for the park owners and residents as I step around the potholes and past the overflowing dumpsters.
I am grateful our site is at the far end of the park, away from the highway and the dumpsters. I am thankful I can go out with my husband on short excursions to nearby wildlife preserves and parks. I am blessed to be healthy and able to attend church services – socially distanced and masked.
We are looking forward to the end of August. Andy’s contract at the hospital will be over, and we’ll go back to Missouri for a short visit.
I believe God heard my prayers. I cried out to Him, and he used a child to get my attention. To refocus me outward on Him and His many blessings.
I am thankful for my faith, my family, and my life.
Galatians 5:22-23 22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23gentleness, and self-control. Against such things, there is no law.
